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Is Surrogacy for a Single Man or Single Woman Possible?

Surrogacy is often associated with married couples or partners, but what about single people? Is it legally and practically possible for a single man or woman to become a parent through surrogacy in the United States? The short answer is: yes. But just like any family-building journey, single parent surrogacy comes with its own unique challenges and considerations.

Below, we explore how surrogacy works for single individuals, what they need to prepare for, and how to build the support system necessary for a successful experience.

Can You Become a Parent Through Surrogacy if You’re Single?

Yes, you absolutely can. There is no federal law in the United States that prohibits single men or women from becoming parents through surrogacy. However, laws vary by state, and it’s crucial to know the legal landscape before moving forward.

State-by-State Differences

Some states are surrogacy-friendly and explicitly allow single individuals to become intended parents. Others may have restrictions or lack clear legal guidelines.

For Example:

  • California, Illinois, and Connecticut are very surrogacy-friendly.
  • Michigan and New York (prior to recent legal updates) have been more restrictive.

Biological Connection

A single intended parent can pursue surrogacy using their own genetic material (sperm or eggs), or they may need to use a donor. Gestational surrogacy, which involves a surrogate carrying a baby genetically unrelated to her, is the most common route.

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What Should People Know Before Coming Into Single Parent Surrogacy?

While the process for single men and women is similar to that for couples, there are some important nuances.

Emotional Readiness

You need to ask yourself if you're ready to raise a child alone. This includes not only the love and nurturing you'll provide, but the time, financial stability, and personal support systems you have in place.

Legal & Financial Responsibilities

Surrogacy can be expensive. The total cost can range from $100,000 to $200,000+, including surrogate compensation, agency fees, legal expenses, and medical procedures. Be prepared for:

  • Upfront payments and trust account funding
  • Long-term financial planning for the child’s upbringing
  • Insurance coverage details for the baby and surrogate

International Considerations

If you're considering international surrogacy, things get more complex. U.S. citizens using surrogates abroad should check citizenship and visa rules on this resource.

Identify a Support Person

One of the most important things for single intended parents is identifying a support person early in the process. This isn't just a "nice to have" – it’s often considered essential by agencies, clinics, and surrogates.

Why It Matters

Pregnancy is unpredictable. Emergencies can arise. You might be required to travel or stay for extended periods during delivery. A support person ensures you're not handling everything solo during such critical times.

You might also need help post-birth, especially during the first few months. A support person can step in for:

  • Hospital logistics
  • Emotional backup during stressful moments
  • Practical help with newborn care and home preparation

What Is the Role of a Support Person to a Single Intended Parent?

Your support person might be a close friend, parent, sibling, or even a doula. The key is that they are reliable, emotionally available, and physically present when needed.

Key Responsibilities:

  • Pre-birth: Attending doctor appointments, helping with nursery setup, joining surrogate milestones
  • During birth: Being on call, handling travel and hospital logistics, assisting with communication with the medical team
  • Post-birth: Providing care support during your transition home, offering emotional encouragement, running errands

Some U.S. hospital policies may even require a second adult to be present for certain situations involving newborn discharge. For reference, check federal hospital guidelines via this resource.

Legal Steps for Single Parents

Establishing parentage is a legal process that varies by state. Single intended parents need to work closely with a lawyer to:

  • Draft and sign a surrogacy agreement
  • Secure pre-birth or post-birth orders confirming legal parentage
  • Navigate state-specific parentage laws and requirements

Keep in mind that having legal documents in place before embryo transfer is often required. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services provides guidance on family-building options at this resource.

Conclusion

Yes, surrogacy for a single man or single woman is entirely possible in the U.S. It requires thoughtful planning, legal counsel, emotional readiness, and a solid support system. But if you’re willing to invest in the process, you can absolutely become a parent and create the family you’ve dreamed of.

Remember: You are not alone in this journey. From agencies to attorneys, counselors to support people — there is a whole network ready to help you succeed.

If you're a single individual considering surrogacy, now is the time to start researching, asking questions, and building your team. Your future family is within reach.

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